What a One-Hit Wonder Taught Me About Advertising

Setting: A London Pub in the punk rock riddled days of the early to mid-1980s. We enter in the middle of a conversation...

"... oboe, cello, keyboard and kettle drums. We'll have ourselves a smash hit!"

For some reason, Life in a Northern Town has stuck with me through the years. I liked the song when it came out back when MTV was concerned mostly with music and showed videos. I was in college, in the middle of my REM/Police/U2/cheap beer phase.

So how did it cut through the Weideman-soaked haze to stick with me as my choice for greatest one-hit wonder ever?

I think mostly it has to do with the combination of sounds that make the song perfect. It was about doing something so different that people had to notice. The Dream Academy came together and produced one song that, to me, is very memorable.

I still like this song. A lot. A lot more than anyone who in his Rory Gallagher/microbrew/get the kids to baseball practice phase should. So, what did it teach me about strategy?

1. Cut through the clutter of sameness.
   If you're doing the same thing as your competitors, you won't be noticed by consumers.
2. Provide something of unsurpassed quality.
   If you're doing it half-assed, not only are you missing an opportunity, you kinda suck.
   
3. Believe in what you're doing.
   If you don't, you'll never convince your client he should be doing what you're advising him to do.
   
4. Tell a good story.
   'Nuff said.

So that's what I learned, although I probably didn't know it at the time. (I blame the Weidemann.) But at least now, working for a Kansas City website design company, I can recall why I like it use it as an analogy for the business.

Or metaphor. Whatever. It's a good song.

What's Up? Chicken Butt!

This is a stock answer I've used to have fun with nieces, nephews, children of friends and drunk people at the bar for years. It's a joke, and admittedly, a bad one. But it's funny once in a while.

Now KFC is putting ads on the backsides of female college students. It's a joke, and I claim, an ad which is in bad taste. But it's funny not at all and is badvertising in the strictest sense of the word.

Now, I'm all for advertising where your target audience is likely to see the ad, but I think this pushes the limits and is only trying to make news, not do good advertising.

The ad has a picture of the Colonel and says "Double Down." That's the extent of it.

I'm sure it was Harland Sanders' dream when he built his chicken empire to have his likenes on the derriers of liberal arts students across the country.

Guys in their late teens and early twenties are the ones most like to buy this culinary gem. So KFC its product where they feel the audience is looking.

But I think the ad is disjointed. I'll explain. Let's take a look at this morsel.

The awkwardly named Double Down is two chicken breasts with bacon, cheese and sauce jammed in between. No bun. It's bunless. The advertise on the asses of young women, targeting young men. Get it?

Neither do I. I think it's creating a stir just for the sake of getting the name of this thing in the news. The medium overwhelms the message.

While it goes just far enough to create a stir, I think the campaign misses an opportunity. if it wants to objectify the female anatomy, wouldn't it make more sense to advertise this sammich on the front of their t-shirt rather than the back of their pants?

I'm just saying...

This promo is cheesy, but it means well

I must say that I have somewhat mixed emotions on this subject. I'll explain why, but suffice it to say I don't know which side of the fence I will land on.

White Castle is making available hamburger-scented candles.

I'm all for cross promotion, but I think this is pushing the limit of synergy. Is there really a need? Does someone really want their living room to smell like greasy little sliders?

Apparently so, is the answer, because there has been such a demand for the little items that they are sold out.

Let me repeat that... They sold out of hamburger-scented candles. Don't worry. They're ordering more.

I would never think that there would be a market for such a thing, but I'm not in marketing. I write copy.

The proceeds from the sale of the candles benefit Autism Speaks. While it may be a stretch for me to imagine why White Castle would produce hamburger-scented candles, it is not a stretch for me to to encourage donating in some small way to that wonderful organization. As the parent of an autistic child, I give my support to this by saying emphatically, "I wouldn't have suggested it, but whatever. Thanks for the donation."

How do you get a candle to smell like a hamburger, anyway? Hopefully it'll say on the box, because I'm buying a candle the next White Castle I see.

Visit the website to learn more at www.autismspeaks.org.